So, recently reading and reviewing Perfect Fudge by Hazel M. Larsen (see previous post) has got me thinking about supernatural creatures, and the choices characters make in these books about whether or not to be one (if they even have the choice). Now, as a human I don’t want to live forever. I’m hoping to keel over when I’m a little over 70. But as a supernatural creature, it’d be so fun to be immortal. I know that’s not everyone’s cup of tea.
So, here are a bunch of supernatural / paranormal / fantastical beings I’ve read books or seen movies about.
Angels: I’m about to get a little spoiler-y here, because I want to clarify why the angels in Perfect Fudge (see previous post for review) are so cool and a fun concept. As you know if you read my review, it introduces a unique concept of guardian angels. These guardian angels don’t really have any biblical connotations, but they help people. They can also fly, teleport, turn invisible, cook food with their mind, heal, clean with the blink of an eye, and whether they start out older or younger, they’ll eventually and then forever appear to be in their 20′s. Of course this is a kind of new version of the idea of angels, but I think it’s awesome.
*I would totally choose to be an angel. There’s almost zero downside.
Vampires: Of course the paranormal lore is different according to legends / authors / movies, but most agree that vampires drink blood (human or animal in most cases), have super speed and strength, and are burned by sunlight. I think the slight majority opinion is that vampires can hold on to their humanity if they choose – at least Christopher Moore, Anne Rice, Charlaine Harris, and Stephanie Meyer think so. (I probably just discredited this theory a bit by mentioning Meyer, but hey whatever). I personally agree with this – I think vampires can choose how humane they want to be. I don’t believe that vampires are “damned”, but that has more to do with the fact that I don’t believe in heaven or hell, so how could I believe in damnation? And even if someone showed me proof that all that existed and your soul could be damned… well I don’t know if that would convince me not to be a vampire.
*If a vampire walked up to me tonight and offered to make me a vamp… I would definitely want to say yes. Honestly, the only thing holding me back here is that the honeyman said that if I was a vampire, he’d have to try to kill me. And you know, that kind of means breaking up, and I don’t want that, I love my honeyman. Honestly, angels can do more cool shit than vampires, but for some reason the idea of being a vampire is more appealing to me… it’s probably just more familiar of an idea.
Werewolves: Again, the lore is really different here. Some say that werewolves only change during a full moon and have no control during that time. Some say that weres that change whenever they want and are conscious the whole time. Most agree that you transform into a big huge scary wolf-like creature (unless you’re the director of the 3rd Harry Potter movie, in which you think weres transform into some weird, sad hairy mandog-looking creature). Generally though, werewolves are bad-ass and powerful and scary-looking.
*Whether or not I agree to be a were would depend on the lore we’re going with here. I personally choose to think that weres are like the ones on True Blood – that they can change at will and know what they’re doing when they’re in that form. And if that were the case then hell yes I’d be a werewolf.
Witch / wizard: Okay, does this one even need much explaining? The term witch general means one who can do magic – cast spells, has powers, etc. They’re usually not immortal. My personal favorite? The Charmed witches. I love Piper. Oh and Harry Potter of course, can’t forget him.
*I’d agree to be a witch in a heartbeat.
Elves: Elves are cool fantastical creatures. They’re usually nature-nuts, proud, arrogant, secretive, and skinny. But they’re also powerful, graceful, and have magical abilities. In most fantasy, elves are not to be trifled with.
* I suppose that yes, I’d agree to be an elf. Even if meant me getting all weird and slender looking.
Fairies: I think that sometimes the lines between fairies and elves blend and are kind of together called “fae” creatures. I usually think of fairies as little pixies – tiny winged creatures with magical abilities, like Tinkerbell. Gotta love Tink.
* I don’t think I’d agree to be a fairy… depends on the scope of magical abilities. But I think I’d feel too vulnerable being that tiny, and the biggest appeal of being a supernatural creature is being able to feel like the shit and be powerful and stuff.
Mutants: Now here’s a fun one. I’ll let in on a little secret… I believe almost any of these paranormal creatures could exist. Who the hell am I to say that they don’t just because I’ve never had the luck to meet one? I know, I know, I’m like a big kid. Anyways, I like the idea of mutants because to me they are the most likely supernatural creatures to exist. Well, actually they’re still technically humans. They’re not magic, they’re just evolutionally-advanced humans. But still, I’m counting em. Think of the X-Men, the X-Men are awesome! Sure, some of them have pretty lame mutations, but most of them are cool and useful in some way (after all, the point of nature evolving like this would be the progression of human life).
* Sign me up! I know I’m 24, but I’m still hoping some sign of cool mutant abilities will show… or maybe I’ll just go the Alex Mac route and get cool mutant-like powers from radiation and chemicals It’s either mutant powers or cancer… 50/50 odds aren’t too bad, right?
Zombies: Okay, who the hell would want to be a zombie? I’m including them on the list because they are a really popular paranormal creature these days, but they’re basically rotting humans that can’t think anything other than “BRAAAIIIINSS”.
* Hell no, I wouldn’t be a zombie. But I can’t wait for the zombie apocalypse so I can be a zombie-killer! I’ll judge anyone who actually says they’d choose to be a zombie. Weirdo.
Unicorns / Dragons: These are two of the most popular paranormal animals really. Unicorns are supposed to be all sweet and crazy magical, and dragons are supposed to be all nasty and fire-breathing. Honestly, I think both are really cool but I don’t think I’d ever choose to turn into one. I’d feel like a magical pet.
Giants / Goblins / Leprechauns: So these don’t need much explaining. Giants are huge, goblins are tiny and mean, and leprechauns are tiny and lucky. I think I’d reject all of these just on basis of size.
Gods: Well, gods are pretty self-explanatory too. I’m thinking of two sets of gods in particular – the Greek mythology gods, and the gods and godlings in the Inheritance Trilogy by N.K. Jemisin. Either way, all are bad-ass. I love that gods are such all-powerful beings, but that they’re also usually petty just like humans. I don’t know why humanity ever gave up on Greek gods as a religion, I probably would have been a believer.
*I would totally be a god. You practically can’t be killed, and you are the baddest mofo out there. Seriously as powerful as all hell. For someone whose severe lack of ambition means I want to be a housewife, I’m surprisingly power-hungry when it comes to paranormal creatures.
I think that covers most of the supernatural creatures I’ve been thinking of…
Oh, and for funsies here are some of my favorite books / movies relating the all of the above:
- Perfect Fudge by Hazel M. Larsen (angels)
- Sookie Stackhouse series by Charlaine Harris (vampires, werewolves)
- Inheritance trilogy by N.K. Jemisin (gods, godlings)
- Bloodsucking Fiends /You Suck / Bite Me by Christopher Moore
- Interview With A Vampire by Anne Rice
- X-Men movies
- Outlander series by Diana Gabaldon (time-travellers, not mentioned)
- Living With the Dead series by Jesse Petersen (zombies)
- Inheritance Cycle by Christopher Paolini (dragons, elves, fae)
- Harry Potter by J.K. Rowling (witches, wizards, unicorn)
- The Kingkiller Chronicles by Patrick Rothfuss (wizards, fae)
- True Blood tv show (vampires, werewolves, fairies, fae)
- Charmed tv show (witches, leprechauns, giants, fairies, vampires)
So, whatcha think?
If one of these creatures walked up to you and offered to make you one of them, would you do it? Which one would you want to be the most? Any that I missed that you’d choose to be? Or would you go the crazy route and refuse them all and choose to remain human?