Harry Potter readalong! All the VOLDY-time

Good morning and Happy Harry Potter post day! This section was kinda dark but quite fun, right?

Jumping right in, Harry is an ass for blaming Snape for Sirius coming to the Ministry to rescue him. I mean come on Harry, you know damn well that it wasn’t Snape’s teasing that made Sirius rush there – it was you, and the fact that he cared about you and would always rush anywhere to help you if you were in danger. Suck it up dude. Don’t blame Snape for something that was mostly your fault.

Bullet-points? Yes.

  • Felix Felicis makes you feel good and everything goes your way and would obviously be abused like crack in the wizarding world. I mean honestly, there must be SO many adult wizards who just mix it into their morning coffee, despite the risks of over-use.
  • So, Snape used to usually write potion directions on the board, right? But here Slughorn is using the textbooks’ potion directions, which obviously are incapable of ever producing a potion correctly because Hermione follows them and can’t even manage it. Does Slughorn not realize this? Why isn’t he teaching the kids how to make the potions the right way?
  • What would you guys do if you had a day of liquid luck to use? I would TOTALLY play the lottery. Obvs. Or if that for some reason didn’t work, I’d go get an awesome job of somesort that pays awesomely and gives me flexible hours and relates to books in some way.
haaay

Haaaaay.

  • Tiny Voldy is hella creepy.

teeny voldy

almost as creepy as this…

WHAT THE HELL

SO EFFIN CREEPY

  • But am I the only one who’s totally loving seeing all of Voldy’s backstory? It’s so INTERESTING. He was a sociopath even as a BABY. That’s crazy. And we find out exactly who his parents were, and that the Slytherin line fell really far because they’re all inbred, and he was all murdering folks as a teen. But he was super sneaky about it, whereas right now he’s all just killing parents of Hogwarts kids and stuff…
i kill what you love

how Voldy feels inside

  • Back to the kids, and it’s so teenage-y! Harry realizes he has some feelings for Ginny. Ron is snogging Lavender because he’s mad that Hermione probably snogged Viktor, and Hermione is going all crazy-girl on him and attacking him with little teeny magical birds and that’s awesome and hilarious. They’re so confused, but you can see the love-y feelings coming out.

romantic gaze

  • Minister Rufus sucks, cause he wants to use Harry as a Ministry of Magic posterboy. And Percy sucks as well. Of course.
  • When the older Weasley brothers just casually flick their wand and make gravy go back in the bowl before spilling, all I hear in my head is “LIKE A BOSS”.
  • Dumbly-dore mentions something on page 363 about child-Voldy, of “the woman he had thought could not be a witch if she had succumbed to the shameful human weakness of death”. Geez. So he was obviously obsessed with not dyin’, but why didn’t Dumbles like IMMEDIATELY say “Dude- wizards and witches die too, it’s natural, circle of life, etc.” I mean it probably wouldn’t have made much a difference, but ya never know.
  • Ron is poisoned! Dun dun dunnnnn.

~Sarah

18 comments

  1. OMG THAT CREEPY GIF

    WHAT DID I JUST WATCH

    Also, I never even thought about the potions directions. Slughorn is too busy sucking up to celebrities and eating candy pineapple to teach properly, I guess.

    1. LOL.

      Yeah. Also, I thought maybe it was because the book was so old (Harry says it’s 50 years old) but Hermione should have a brand new book and apparently the directions still aren’t good enough. Like, how does anyone learn how to correctly make potions unless they have a natural knack for it like Snape, Slughorn, and Lily?

  2. I don’t think Harry should be putting ALL the blame on Snape for Sirius’s death, but I do think Snape’s jabs contributed to it, just as Kreacher sucking and Dumbles not keeping Harry in the loop contributed.

    You are right times 1000 about abuse of FF. There should be a whole ward for FF abusers at St. Mungos.

    Totally didn’t consider that Snape used to write the potion’s directions on the board, and he was prob using his own versions which is why Hermione always did so well. I wonder if Slughorn just doesn’t realize how crappy the textbook instructions are, cos he seems like a capable potions maker himself.

    1. Idk… I doubt that Snape’s words were running through Sirius’s mind when he heard that Harry was in trouble. He just knew he had to go to his aid – I think he would have done that no matter what. I DO think Snape is partly to blame for not getting a message to Harry sooner that he checked and Sirius was okay, or for not figuring out how to get Harry away from Umbridge, but not for being snide.

      Also, I’m wondering now if Snape’s handwriting on the board is a lot different than his handwriting? Cause otherwise, wouldn’t Harry kind of recognize the handwriting in his textbook?

  3. I would be a Felix Felicis addict if I was a wizard, I reckon. Because HOW do you resist that kind of thing?!

    I actually can’t get enough Voldy backstory. If JK wanted to do a whole SERIES of Voldy prequels, I would be perfectly ok with that.

    1. Truth. I wish I had some Felix Felicis right now!

      I would totally read a Voldy-history series too. Orrrr I kind of spoof Voldy “tell-all”, like those celebrities on E! Hollywood True Stories (not sure if you have that there, but it’s ridic).

  4. WTF is that creepy gif, anyway? And how did you find it? Did you type something like “creepy prancing alien mannequin gif” into google?

    Yes, Harry is an ass to blame Snape, but what I really want to know is why there isn’t a better form of therapy available to harry other than the wizarding world equivalent of Keep Calm and Quidditch On?

    1. I’ve had it saved for so long I don’t actually remember… I think maybe I was looking for “dancing GIFs” and somehow that’s what Tumblr gave me. Been waiting for the slightest opportunity to use it, lol.

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