Bite Me

You Suck: A Love Story by Christopher Moore

You Suck by Christopher Moore

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“She knew it should bother her more, being evil and all, but after she put on a little mascara and some lipstick and poured herself another cup of blood-laced coffee, she found that she was okay with it.”

**Just a reminder here guys – You Suck is the sequel to Bloodsucking Fiends, so if you haven’t read it yet, there are some spoilers for the first book. **

Tommy Flood wakes up to find that he’sΒ a vampire, and his girlfriend Jody turned him into one. Without even asking. Sheesh. But being in love, they stick together and just want to settle down and live out their undead years. Unforunately, Jody was supposed to leave town but didn’t, which attracts some unfavorable attention from the cops. They have a 16-year old perky Goth minion, Abby, to try to help run their errands, and they’re being hunted down by Tommy’s grocery store buddies at the urging of a blue hooker named Blue. So you know, that all sucks.

If possible, I love You Suck even more than Bloodsucking Fiends. I don’t remember if that’s how I felt the first time I read these, but it’s definitely true this time around. It’s rare that a sequel is better than the first book. I think it’s partly because Abby Normal is in this book – she’s a hysterically dramatic Goth teenager, and cracks me up a lot throughout the book. Mostly, this book is a lot like the first though – funny, engaging, and a little sweet, despite all the vampires and blood-sucking. It’s mostly a fluff read.

What’s great about Moore though is that he puts some great bits in his stories that actually kind of say a lot, amidst all the goofiness. Like this:

“Until she had been changed and had stalked the city as a vampire, she never realized that virtually every moment she had been there as a woman, she had been a little bit afraid. A man would never understand.

The first time I read this, I was like “YES. THIS.” Because it’s pretty true – without even realizing it or conciously doing it, we women take little precautions because we understand on some instinctive level how much danger there is out there lurking, and how little prepared we are to defend ourselves (for most of us, anyways). And I love that Jody recognizes that and celebrates her new role as a vampire – that she no longer is a victim because now SHE’S the one people should be afraid of. That she can handle herself if any asshole decides to try to screw around with her. Basically, Jody is a badass and I love her. She’s easily one of my favorite Moore characters.

And well… I love that Jody kind of embraces being a vampire, whether it technically makes her evil or not (see quote at the top there). Well, because I think people put too much stock in the “vampires are damned” thing. Maybe it’s because I’m largely an athiest, but that never bothered me much.

Anyyyywho, there’s one more book in Moore’s vampire trilogy, called Bite Me. I don’t rememer enjoying that one as much as the first two, but I’m looking forward to re-reading it soon.

If you’re looking to read something in the spirit of Halloween that’s not too scary or depressing, you should check out this trilogy. I mean, you can read these books in basically a day, so what are you waiting for? It’s so awesome.

Sarah Says: 4.5 stars

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